#csa
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When i heard this audio, i didnt think of past break ups, i thought of my father and the hurt he caused me for the CSA he put me through. One of the most shameful aspects for me even after he went to prison was that there was still a part of me that cared about him. Was i terrified of him? 100%. And did i still care about him? 100%. I remember when i testified against him, his lawyer brought out birthday cards i had wrote him that said “i love you, dad.” He asked how i could write that. I said because its the truth. I did love him. Despite the things he did to me. That was what i knew love was. While this may not be everyone’s experience with CSA, my relationship with my abuser was rooted in both s and emotional ab*se in which i was taught to believe i was truly helping him. After years of healing, i am able to see all parts and greet all parts of myself with love. That little girl. That pre teen girl. All she was trying to do was survive. Now i hold space for others to start to accept all their parts, too. #csa #csasurvivor #childhoodtrauma #complextrauma
I’ve tried filming this video more times than I can count over the last 2 years. Experiencing CSA for 10+ years made me believe that there was something inherently wrong with me in comparison to my siblings, and I was scared that once I shared my story, others would see it too. I now know that to not be true. I’m not sure where to start with all the ways it’s impacted my being and my relationship with Allah (God), but I would like to just start somewhere. Anywhere. And I hope doing so will help other survivors in the process, while also bringing awareness to the issue of CSA in the Muslim and Somali community. #csa #october #domesticabuseawareness #domesticviolenceawareness #muslimah #muslim #somali #csasurvivor #grooming #csaawareness #cptsd #fyp
CSA Survivor & AUTHOR of “Strength Beyond the Shadows” : Seth Gehle My memoir is available on Amazon. The link is in my bio. #csa #survivor #story #abuse #trauma #traumatok #childhoodtrauma #ptsd #victim #sa #softwhiteunderbelly #mentalhealth #mentalhealthmatters #mentalhealthawareness #sad #storytime #storytelling #author #authorsoftiktok #authortok #memoir #memoirs #booktok #book #books